#11 Love

"Am I gettting fat?"
Baby, you look just as stunning as the moment I first saw you, the moment you stole my heart.

"Do you love me?"
I love you, and I will love you more each and every day.

 "Which one is prettier? Me or your ex-girlfriend?"
Baby I love you, and the girl I love is the most beautiful girl in my life.

"Will you still love me when I'm old?"
I will love you until the day when the sun rises from the west.

"Did you miss me?"
I miss your eyes, your smile, your hair, your smell, the way you look at me, the moment I hold you tight. I miss you.

"Will you ever get tired of me?"
How can I ever get tired of you making me laugh, constantly lighten up my world? You had entered my life so much that it wouldn't be the same without you.

"Will you leave me for someone better than me?"
That person doesn't exist because you are the person who knows me the best.

#10 Rival, best friend

Do you have this best friend, which hangs out with you, but you are always competing with? He may not be competing with you, but you think that he is just around your level that you can “win” him just a little bit?

This is a story about my friend from my hometown. I use “story” because it may not be true at all, but a little inspiration of mine pushes me to write this.

At primary school, we were normal friends. We hang out, we have fun, I have my best friend, he has his best friend. He seem to be quite popular.

At secondary school, we were assign to the same class. That’s how we become best friends. Back in the day in form one, we didn’t have anyone we know, so we stick together. We join the same club and society, we play the same online games. It was good times.

Then, I start to notice some differences. We were both a member of Boys’ Brigade, and we need to learn a music instrument. We both take up the same music instrument, but I learn faster than him. One day, our instructor scolded us because our progress is too slow, but I didn’t feel much guilty because I think the instructor wasn’t scolding me as I already learnt the part required. He ended up crying, it was the first time I saw him cry. Later the next year, he quits and join other society.

At academic studies, my result was always better than him, plus his personality somehow makes him a target to be mocked. Secondary school was brutal, students bully the weak, even teachers sometimes bully the weak. He sometimes was “attacked” by others, I sometimes feel sorry for him. But we would never lied to each other, we remain honest and treat each other truthfully.

At sports and computer games, he definitely did better than me. He run faster, he runs longer, he jumps far, he play sports, and he spends time longer to play online games. One sport that I know and he doesn’t is swim, but he is also learning it now.

Back in the day, I was naïve. My definition of winning was be better at academic, and this make me seems like a winner. Then, it all changes when I entered university.

When I entered university, I studied in Selangor, but he remains at Melaka. We still hang out one in a while when I back Melaka. As we spend time at different places, our interaction gets less by the day. But one day what he said really touches me, he said I was his best friend. This makes me feels guilty, as I didn’t think that I deserved to be his best friend as I keep neglecting him. Then, my academic results in university getting worst by the day, he seems to be catching up on his results. He has his own group of friends, and he could earn money using online games.

What about me? Sucks. Sucks at academic results, sucks at managing a club, sucks at managing myself, sucks at earning money, and still kind of sucks at sports. My definition of winning is not just about academic anymore, it changes to how well you manage your life, and he was definitely wining me.

His birthday just passed, and I will never forget this rival/best friend of mine. It reminded me that life is not about competing with others, but competing with your own values and beliefs. Only when you achieve something which validates your value and your beliefs, you can be a winner. 

#9 Watch out!!

Old habits die hard.

It feels like I'm getting lazier again, unmotivated, procrastinating. Damn it.

However, like they say, we faces challenges or "temporary defeat" just before we succeed. It's time to get back in motion!

The book "The monk who sold his Ferrari" written that in order to make something a habit, you must do the same activity for 21 days at the same time. Actually I do like to put it to test, maybe today will be the first of the 21 days.

Aside from that, I found that its nice to read motivational book when I'm boring. Sometimes it gives me the energy I needed for a paradigm shift. At least better than facing laptop and doing nothing.

Its time to end the day, and tomorrow will be a better one!